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Please Critique: Does this Sales Letter work for both dedicated followers and cold contacts?

by vallejomedia
4 replies
Trying to launch this book this week to a pretty active community of social media followers. From there I'd like to move into more cold contacts possibly using ads ect. Would this sales letter work for both?

Golden Ebook

I'm having trouble with my WP Optin plugin and playing just a regularly uploaded video, which is why I had to go through Youtube for right now. Any other feedback on the letter is also appreciated.

Thanks for the critique WF!!
#cold #contacts #dedicated #followers #vsl #work
  • Profile picture of the author Tim R
    I think if you end up paying for ads to send cold traffic to this page, you're going to have a tough time making much of a profit if selling your book for $11.

    Do you have an upsell?

    Tim.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
    Without reading your products, I can't say... what I really wanna say.

    But... I will say...

    The video is painfully boring.

    You're not hitting the pain points effectively at all.

    So my question is:

    Is this video a REAL reflection of what's in your ebooks?

    If the answer is yes, go back to the drawing board on all levels.

    If no...

    Figure out how to spotlight the benefits in your product with a ton more gusto and authority.

    Otherwise...

    I don't see this converting... from any traffic... warm, cold... or boiling hot.

    Mark
    Signature

    Do you want a 10 figure copywriter and biz owner to Write With You? I'll work with you and your team, on zoom. Discover More

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    • Profile picture of the author Ltemodel
      Here is a little video critique. Hope this helps a little.


      Here are a couple of bullets I came up with to give you an example.

      My destroyed every pair of shoes I owned until I employed this special training technique. (page 23)

      This simple lesson will take your golden from being a absolute terror to peaceful and obedient in less than a week. (chapter 3)

      Good Luck
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      • Profile picture of the author oscarb
        Nice critique --excellent quickie primer on good sales copy. Pay attention, beginners!
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