Your Expert's Critique Needed

Your headline needs a concise way to convey the SPECIFIC benefits of what YOUR digital magazines offer. Just saying a person can benefit from a digital magazine won't make anyone clamor for one.

-Nick

Magik,

I went ahead and did a quick video critique for the page:


Best,
Ray Edwards

Agree on the headline. It needs some work. Just off the top of my head after looking at your site it looks like the big idea is to gain credibility in the buyers field. I would use something along the lines of

"Now You Can Have Instant Credibility In Your Market With Your Own Digital Magazine.. And I'll Do All The Work!"

You need to give the reader a reason not to click back and go on to the next page. As it is your headline won't cut it.

I would also redo the lead to give it more of a story to add some interest in it.

"A few years ago I was talking to my accountant who was struggling to bring in more business. He was worried that he might have to close his doors and go to work for one of those 'cattle shute' tax preparers if things didn't turn around. There was only enough to pay this months rent and utilities and that would be the end.

I asked him, why he had such issues getting new clients and his response shocked me..

' people don't know who I am.'

That's when I suggested that he try his own publication, but he thought it was too expensive. I told him it wasn't so he gave it a try. Now he has thousands of clients and makes a hundred thousand dollars a month, has 20 employees and moved his headquarters to Miami Florida."

Of course I just put that together off the top of my head and didn't put a ton of thought into it.