The Christmas Cartoon And Joke Thread
Nearly that time of year again. Let's put some smiles on faces with a bumper crop of Christmas related cartoons and jokes.
I'll start the (snow)ball rolling . .
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A family had twin boys whose only resemblance to each other was their looks. Opposite in every way, one was an eternal optimist, and the other a gloomy pessimist. Just to see what would happen, on Christmas day their father loaded the pessimist's room with every imaginable toy and game, and in the optimist son's room he put a ton of horse manure. That night the father passed by the pessimist's room and found him sitting amid his new gifts crying bitterly.
"Why are you crying?" the father asked.
"Because my friends will be jealous, I'll have to read all these instructions before I can do anything with this stuff, I'll constantly need batteries, and my toys will eventually get broken", answered the pessimist twin.
Passing the optimist twin's room, the father found him dancing for joy in the pile of manure.
"What are you so happy about?" he asked. To which his optimist twin replied . . .
"There's got to be a pony in here somewhere!"
A Russian couple were walking down the street in St. Petersburg on Christmas Eve when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining," he said to his wife.
"No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied.
"No, I'm sure it was just rain, he said."
Just as they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing they saw a minor communist party official walking towards them. "Let's not fight about it," the man said, "let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing."
As the official approached, the man said, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?"
"It's raining, of course," he answered, and walked on. But the woman insisted: "I know that felt like snow!" To which the man quietly replied: "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!"
I'll start the (snow)ball rolling . .
.A family had twin boys whose only resemblance to each other was their looks. Opposite in every way, one was an eternal optimist, and the other a gloomy pessimist. Just to see what would happen, on Christmas day their father loaded the pessimist's room with every imaginable toy and game, and in the optimist son's room he put a ton of horse manure. That night the father passed by the pessimist's room and found him sitting amid his new gifts crying bitterly.
"Why are you crying?" the father asked.
"Because my friends will be jealous, I'll have to read all these instructions before I can do anything with this stuff, I'll constantly need batteries, and my toys will eventually get broken", answered the pessimist twin.
Passing the optimist twin's room, the father found him dancing for joy in the pile of manure.
"What are you so happy about?" he asked. To which his optimist twin replied . . .
"There's got to be a pony in here somewhere!"
A Russian couple were walking down the street in St. Petersburg on Christmas Eve when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining," he said to his wife.
"No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied.
"No, I'm sure it was just rain, he said."
Just as they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing they saw a minor communist party official walking towards them. "Let's not fight about it," the man said, "let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing."
As the official approached, the man said, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?"
"It's raining, of course," he answered, and walked on. But the woman insisted: "I know that felt like snow!" To which the man quietly replied: "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!"