Gold in Faeces 'Worth Millions'

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The human kind.

Could cause a gold rush to the rest-room

Gold in faeces 'worth millions' - BBC News
  • Profile picture of the author butters
    Always knew my poo was worth millions!!
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  • Profile picture of the author Joe Mobley
    I'm thinking there may be some new opportunities for those sentenced to "community service"...


    Joe Mobley
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    New show coming to Discovery soon: Gold Flush.
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  • Profile picture of the author seasoned
    Well, it is NO secret that humans have a lot of metal in their excrement. Rather than fix the problem, they are now thinking about EXPLOITING it! When I was a kid, and even decades later, MANY kids had lots of silver in their diet. TODAY, many are pushing aluminum. There IS still gold, though it was probably more popular a couple hundred years ago.

    Steve
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  • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
    You learn something new every day. The Brits have a plural for feces:faeces.

    In related news, references to multiple versions of Claude shall now and forever be spelled Claeude.
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    Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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    • Profile picture of the author Cali16
      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      In related news, references to multiple versions of Claude shall now and forever be spelled Claeude.
      Multiple versions of Claude?? That's a scary thought!!
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      • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
        Originally Posted by Cali16 View Post

        Multiple versions of Claude?? That's a scary thought!!
        At least they wouldn't be capable of breeding.
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        • Profile picture of the author Kurt
          Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

          At least they wouldn't be capable of breeding.
          Claudes don't breed. Like other simple life forms, they split in two.
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          • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
            Groan, l bet the restrooms in swanky Hotels around the world that serve, $10,000 cocktails with gold leaf, will start mining operations immediately!

            Royal Flush?

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          • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
            Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

            Claudes don't breed. Like other simple life forms, they split in two.
            Uh, I think you might be confusing Claude with his pants.
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            Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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            • Profile picture of the author Kurt
              Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

              Uh, I think you might be confusing Claude with his pants.
              Claudes splitting in two to reproduce and splitting their pants aren't mutually exclusive, which pleases the makers of plaid polyester pants everywhere.
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              • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
                Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

                Claudes splitting in two to reproduce and splitting their pants aren't mutually exclusive, which pleases the makers of plaid polyester pants everywhere.
                Hey! Plaid polyester is making a comeback! Until it does, I'll just continue wearing my leisure suits.







                My God, I remember wearing leisure suits when I was selling life insurance, in the mid 1970s.
                Somebody shoot me. But shoot Kurt first.
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                • Profile picture of the author Ken Leatherman
                  Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

                  Hey! Plaid polyester is making a comeback! Until it does, I'll just continue wearing my leisure suits.







                  My God, I remember wearing leisure suits when I was selling life insurance, in the mid 1970s.
                  Somebody shoot me. But shoot Kurt first.
                  Leisure sh*t of pure gold. Way to go Claude!
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    • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      You learn something new every day. The Brits have a plural for feces:faeces.
      It's just a spelling difference. Unlike, say, the hair on Claude's head, the word only exists in the plural.

      .
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      • Profile picture of the author David Beroff
        "In a previous study, another team of scientists calculated that the waste from one million Americans could contain as much as $13m (£8.6m) worth of metals."
        This sentence could be interpreted to mean that the waste from different countries could have different value. On the one hand, certainly different cultures have different diets, which could theoretically support such a statement. But on the other hand, we are talking such trace amounts that I'm thinking that diet alone may have little influence.

        Other environmental factors, such as the air we breathe and our local soil, probably have much more significant influences on the amount of trace metals in our collective waste.
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  • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
    Gives a whole new meaning to "pinching pennies."
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    Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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    • Profile picture of the author positivenegative
      I'll think twice in future about telling someone they're talking shit; it has value. (Little do WC and Jag realise - they're worth a small fortune)
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      Gives a whole new meaning to "pinching pennies."
      I hate you.



      Originally Posted by Cali16 View Post

      Multiple versions of Claude?? That's a scary thought!!
      Hey! You're supposed to be the nice helpful one!

      My feelings are hurt. Now, I feel like crap....solid gold crap.
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      One Call Closing book https://www.amazon.com/One-Call-Clos...=1527788418&sr

      “Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise; seek what they sought.” - Matsuo Basho
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        I hate you.





        Hey! You're supposed to be the nice helpful one!

        My feelings are hurt. Now, I feel like crap....solid gold crap.

        Pretty funny if you are into tacky 1981 music video shows!

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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        I hate you.


        My work here is done.
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        Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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  • Profile picture of the author thunderbird
    They have my blessings. I won't get in the way on the mining claim they stake in panning for gold.
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    Project HERE.

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  • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
    They were right all along. For years we scoffed at all those "You can make a fortune in your underpants" adverts. Now it looks as they were right.

    I probably have a fortune in mine right now!

    Women everywhere will suddenly look forward to washing men's crusty undies.

    So, there you have it folks, the secret to a happy marriage. Guys never put your undies in the laundry basket until you've made sure they are full of nuggets for your wife to harvest.

    She'll love you for it.
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    Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
    So that blind people can hate them as well.
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  • Profile picture of the author thunderbird
    A new selling point for gold jewelry will be, "100% mined from dirt. No sh*t."

    Man gives woman a huge gold bracelet.

    WOMAN
    Oh, honey, it's beautiful!
    It must have taken 3 whole city
    blocks of sh*t to make it.

    MAN
    It's worth it. No amount of sh*t is too
    much for you, baby.
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    Project HERE.

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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by thunderbird View Post

      A new selling point for gold jewelry will be, "100% mined from dirt. No sh*t."

      Man gives woman a huge gold bracelet.

      WOMAN
      Oh, honey, it's beautiful!
      It must have taken 3 whole city
      blocks of sh*t to make it.

      MAN
      It's worth it. No amount of sh*t is too
      much for you, baby.
      Yes, great slogan for wedding rings,......

      We dump because we care!

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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Interesting and ironic. So the global elite go instantly from planning to cull the populations to sifting through their excrement.
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    Sal
    When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
    Beyond the Path

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