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How to cook a turkey

by Kurt
43 replies
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With Thanksgiving quickly approaching here's quick video demonstrating how to cook a turkey...


  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Doesn't work on Aussies, we just see supersized frozen Turkeys piled up in an open freezer, and ignore it!

    That or think, geesh, isn't Halloween enough?


    But we don't want to take this festive one on, since if we cooked turkeys on a hot day, and have the air con, on full, to compensate, we would have wide spread power blackouts.

    As it is Xmas day will probably be by candlelight?


    At least Vics, are better off than South Australians, those poor *******s, are up s***t creek with all of this nonsense.

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    • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
      I opened this thread in anticipation of seeing instructions on how to set fire to Claude. Very disappointed.

      #sad
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      • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
        Originally Posted by whateverpedia View Post

        I opened this thread in anticipation of seeing instructions on how to set fire to Claude. Very disappointed.

        #sad
        Fake News! Very Very Sad!
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    • Profile picture of the author Kurt
      Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

      Doesn't work on Aussies, we just see supersized frozen Turkeys piled up in an open freezer, and ignore it!

      That or think, geesh, isn't Halloween enough?


      But we don't want to take this festive one on, since if we cooked turkeys on a hot day, and have the air con, on full, to compensate, we would have wide spread power blackouts.

      As it is Xmas day will probably be by candlelight?


      At least Vics, are better off than South Australians, those poor *******s, are up s***t creek with all of this nonsense.
      Sorry, I don't know how to roast an emu. Did you check to see if there's any videos for it on Youtube?
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

        Sorry, I don't know how to roast an emu. Did you check to see if there's any videos for it on Youtube?
        No, but we prefer to just stand under wind turbines, with a bucket, (get no end of fleshly slaughtered birds that way).

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        • Profile picture of the author Kurt
          Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

          No, but we prefer to just stand under wind turbines, with a bucket, (get no end of fleshly slaughtered birds that way).
          Emus get killed by wind turbines? I didn't know that...
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          • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
            Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

            Emus get killed by wind turbines? I didn't know that...
            They can be if the slingshot is big enough!

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        • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
          Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

          No, but we prefer to just stand under wind turbines, with a bucket, (get no end of fleshly slaughtered birds that way).
          Shane; I know it's a joke. But I also know you think wind turbines actually kill birds.

          But birds fly far faster than a wind turbine blade. They can fly through a forest and miss every branch. They fly through a flock of birds, and they don't crash into each other.

          The "Wind turbines are bad because they kill birds" isn't the history of wind turbines.

          Now Kites, on the other hand........Wind turbines hate kites. So a flock of kites would be in real trouble.
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          • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Shane; I know it's a joke. But I also know you think wind turbines actually kill birds.

            But birds fly far faster than a wind turbine blade. The can fly through a forest and miss every branch. They fly through a flock of birds, and they don't crash into each other.

            The "Wind turbines are bad because they kill birds" isn't the history of wind turbines.

            Now Kites, on the other hand........Wind turbines hate kites. So a flock of kites would be in real trouble.
            Geesh, l can't go on my slash and burn anywhere here, sniff, (just got my Frank Kern, Nordic hat, etc).

            But alas true, birds can break the sound barrier, so wind-turbines are no hindrance.

            Neither are jet engines, you just need an unladen swallow, UD40, the Mandela affect, and a time dilation crystal, (STD, Star Trek Discovery).

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            • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
              Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post


              Neither are jet engines, you just need an unladen swallow, UD40, the Mandela affect, and a time dilation crystal, (STD, Star Trek Discovery).
              I guess it just depends on the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow

              Estimating the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow | style.org


              Claude Q. Whitacre Tidbit #1573: "Unladen Swallow" is Claude's nickname at the Wooster Mens Bathhouse and Feather Boa Emporium.
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              • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
                Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

                I guess it just depends on the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow.
                And whether or not it's a European or African swallow.

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          • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
            Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

            Shane; I know it's a joke. But I also know you think wind turbines actually kill birds.

            But birds fly far faster than a wind turbine blade. The can fly through a forest and miss every branch. They fly through a flock of birds, and they don't crash into each other.

            The "Wind turbines are bad because they kill birds" isn't the history of wind turbines.

            Now Kites, on the other hand........Wind turbines hate kites. So a flock of kites would be in real trouble.
            A Kite is also the name of a large bird. Please clarify if you are talking about them or the human construction's that fly's on the end of a long piece of string.

            You just can't get the staff these days
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            • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
              Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

              I guess it just depends on the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow

              Estimating the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow | style.org


              Claude Q. Whitacre Tidbit #1573: "Unladen Swallow" is Claude's nickname at the Wooster Mens Bathhouse and Feather Boa Emporium.
              It was a dark time. I needed the money.



              Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

              A Kite is also the name of a large bird. Please clarify if you are talking about them or the human construction's that fly's on the end of a long piece of string.

              You just can't get the staff these days
              Why in the world would you name a wild bird? They don't come when you call them anyway.

              Expecting a "staff" joke, weren't you?

              No, I am above such Riffle Piffle.
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              • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
                Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

                It was a dark time. They needed the money.
                Fixed that for you.

                Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

                They don't come when you call them anyway.
                If you think you can make things come by calling them, you obviously learned nothing at The Wooster Men's Bathhouse And Sauna.

                #sad
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            • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
              Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

              A Kite is also the name of a large bird.
              Diana Dors is the name of a large bird.
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              • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
                Originally Posted by whateverpedia View Post

                Diana Dors is the name of a large bird.
                How you dredged that name up I'll never know. Here she is in a film with Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing, Probably one of the most boring films ever made.

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    • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
      Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

      At least Vics, are better off than South Australians, those poor *******s, are up s***t creek with all of this nonsense.
      So how's that coal fired power going for Victorians?

      The fragility of Australia's National Energy Market was highlighted again over the weekend, when unit one of Victoria's Yallourn coal-fired power plant tripped on Saturday afternoon.
      The combination of the coal power outages has prompted the market operator to issue a Forecast Lack Of Reserve Level 1 (LOR1) in the state for Tuesday and Wednesday - AEMO's first step towards warning of a potential supply shortage - with temperatures forecast to reach 32°C in the state and stay there for most of the week.
      The events underline that the biggest risk to energy supplies this summer are not variable renewable energy generation, but the failure of country's ageing fossil fuel generators in the mid-summer heat.

      Considering we are technically still in Spring, the current situation does not bode well.
      Another coal unit falls over, leaving Victoria power supply at risk : RenewEconomy
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by whateverpedia View Post

        Lol, pretty funny stuff, it tripped and was out for two days, and thanks to Hazelwood being closed, that used to generate 22% of our electricity, power blackouts are more likely.

        But the chart colors seem appropriate.

        WA, (your state, that apparently has someone with sence running it) and parts of Tasmania are the only states keeping away from SA madness.

        Australia's power grid weakened by wind, solar generation, AEMC calls for plan for security - ABC News (Australian Broadcasting Corporation)

        Running coal fired power plants at peak capacity as well as wind/solar doesn't save anything, but closing them down, and hoping that wind/solar picks up the slack does, but it is also less reliable, in maintaining base load limits.

        SA has constant power blackouts usually spanning 20 minutes, which is why Musk is building the 100,m dollar battery farm there.



        This brings the stipidity into focus...

        Category: | Herald Sun

        So WE are supplying China with the coal to run about 300 new, clean, (yes, maybe not reliable) fired power plants, that are still 60% dirty, while we wan****rs build zero.

        So ignoring other countries, WE are supplying the coal to run another 300 power plants in CHina, as well as the fact that if we turning off everything tomorrow for a year we would reduce CO2 emissions by no more than 3%.

        So the world ends at 97% of present decline instead of 100% if we went back to the stone ages for a year!


        As for inpending doom, l think that this guy after years of predictions that didn't happen wrapped it up, (one of the two MPS, that run the climate committee years ago, have been suppressed) he stated that man made climate predictions have been overrated.

        And maybe the Tesla companys view on this might sink in?

        https://forums.tesla.com/forum/forum...nd-not-manmade

        But l guess that they are funded by the oil company's somewhere?

        After all Musk is an idiot with Space X, electric cars, and that SA thing?


        But maybe next year we will Finally get the global castraphy we have been waiting for and waiting and waiting?


        And in the meantime Australias power becomes less reliable, more expensive, and more people get their power cut, or pensioners miss the occasional meal, and spend winters in a freezing house, and we can clock up the ones that perish, due to high heat or cold, to saving the planet.

        Eventhough since we are supplying coal or soon will be to 299 new Coal fired power plants, we are suffering for absolutely no reason, and pushing MMGW, harder than ever, (if it was true)!


        Here are a few highlights...



        2) Man-made carbon dioxide emissions throughout human history constitute less than 0.00022 percent of the total naturally emitted from the mantle of the earth during geological history.

        7) The 0.7°C increase in the average global temperature over the last hundred years is entirely consistent with well-established, long-term, natural climate trends.



        8) The IPCC theory is driven by just 60 scientists and favorable reviewers not the 4,000 usually cited.

        10) A large body of scientific research suggests that the sun is responsible for the greater share of climate change during the past hundred years.


        11) Politicians and activists claim rising sea levels are a direct cause of global warming but sea levels rates have been increasing steadily since the last ice age 10,000 ago
        That is the reality, MMGW is BS.

        http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news...068f55f2ca6794

        What we are doing to the grid in AU, is unnecessary and excessive, and hurting a lot of people.

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        • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
          Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

          WA, (your state, that apparently has someone with sence running it) and parts of Tasmania are the only states keeping away from SA madness.
          Wrong on two fronts.

          First, the real reason that WA doesn't experience blackouts to the same level of the eastern states is that the generation system is state owned, rather than the privatised mess it is in the east. This means the generation system is tied to community standards and not to private corporations profitability.

          Secondly, WA has a 50% renewable target, same as SA.
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  • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
    Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

    At least Vics, are better off than South Australians, those poor *******s, are up s***t creek with all of this nonsense.:
    More fact free crap from you.
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by whateverpedia View Post

      More fact free crap from you.
      Yeah, power blackouts are good for the environment!

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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

    I guess it just depends on the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow

    Estimating the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow | style.org


    Claude Q. Whitacre Tidbit #1573: "Unladen Swallow" is Claude's nickname at the Wooster Mens Bathhouse and Feather Boa Emporium.
    Yes, hate to get all serious, but l am not 100% sure Claude was running with a gag or being serious?



    Two minutes in an Eagle, which was flying around this monstrosity got clobbered.

    Lighting hit another and it fell down, and others catch alight, (all of that CO2).

    I won't post the solar panel ones, not pretty!

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  • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
    Just because the odd bit of man made tech fails or kills the odd bird occasionally does not mean we should abandon some of our best hopes and ways at generating free, clean energy.
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

    Just because the odd bit of man made tech fails or kills the odd bird occasionally does not mean we should abandon some of our best hopes and ways at generating free, clean energy.
    Best hopes, not really, in a sick, oil targeted society like ours it probably is.

    Solar and wind cannot maintain base load power, l know batterys can back it up, but it is hideously expensive for a very small allotment of time, (1 trillion dollars for 2 hours) based on state electricity demands.

    It works better on a personal level, but it is still not the best solution.

    Enclosed, internal systems, where the core production method is not open to the weather, (wind turbines, attracts bugs, that reduce output and add to it bursting into flames, and high winds, and lighting strikes, etc).

    Solar is better, but it has its own issues, namely it works half the time, and if overcast, less than half the time.

    We should be pouring vast amounts into magnetic, vortex tech, but we won't or bury what works, since it threatens oil jobs, and stock prices.

    We could have an utopian society if we got off this oil bender, but as always the rich, can't let go, (so to speak).

    It is good in a way since it is forcing Victorians and SA'ens, to find ways around the charge 13% or more for elecricity each and every year, mainly for BS reasons.


    Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

    Shane...You seem to have left out how many birds are killed by cats every year....
    But we don't make cats, or more to the point produce acres of the stupid things.

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    • Profile picture of the author Kurt
      Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

      But we don't make cats, or more to the point produce acres of the stupid things.
      So you don't actually care about the birds getting killed. Gotcha.
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

        So you don't actually care about the birds getting killed. Gotcha.
        Feral cats are hard to control, wind farms are easy to control, you just need a truck full of dynamite.

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        • Profile picture of the author Kurt
          Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

          Feral cats are hard to control, wind farms are easy to control, you just need a truck full of dynamite.
          So you don't actually care about the birds getting killed. Gotcha.
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          • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
            Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

            So you don't actually care about the birds getting killed. Gotcha.
            Geesh, where is Claude when l need him?

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            • Profile picture of the author Kurt
              Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

              Geesh, where is Claude when l need him?
              Eating deep fried birds at KFC.
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              • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
                Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

                Eating deep fried birds at KFC.
                Funny l thought that he was sitting on a beach, with an open box of Krispy Kreme's, with Pineapple Tropical Slush Suntan oil on, a baseball cap saying, (l hate gnomes), and a T-shirt on standby saying, "I Hate Riffle Gnomes", while watching deep fried birds?

                A box of open donuts, is a real draw card for surfer chicks,.....at least that is what he has been told.

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                • Profile picture of the author Kurt
                  Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

                  Funny l thought that he was sitting on a beach, with an open box of Krispy Kreme's, with Pineapple Tropical Slush Suntan oil on, a baseball cap saying, (l hate gnomes), and a T-shirt on standby saying, "I Hate Riffle Gnomes", while watching deep fried birds?

                  A box of open donuts, is a real draw card for surfer chicks,.....at least that is what he has been told.
                  Fake news. Everyone here knows Claude doesn't go to the beach anymore because every time he did Green Peace would try to push him into the water.
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                  • Profile picture of the author DWolfe
                    Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

                    Fake news. Everyone here knows Claude doesn't go to the beach anymore because every time he did Green Peace would try to push him into the water.
                    Ouch LOL Kurt that was funny !!!
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                  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
                    Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

                    Fake news. Everyone here knows Claude doesn't go to the beach anymore because every time he did Green Peace would try to push him into the water.
                    He can't help it, the water and sand, confuses his sense of direction, and before we know it, the next day he is lying belly up, in the surf, with the jellyfish, making a futile attempt at getting up.

                    Not sure if the bottle of Tequila Sunrise we find closeby is related, and children do occasionally, poke him, but not before the parents say, "don't get to close junior, he could be dangerous"?


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  • Profile picture of the author Princess Balestra
    tbh I jus' fall asleep on the beach.

    Done in mebbe 30 minutes if I am sumplace exotic.
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
    Here is some more light reading.

    Yeah, l know, Murdock, Tabliod, blah, blah, but there is also information about Flannery and his track record of failed predictions.

    Category: | Herald Sun

    And this....

    Category: | Herald Sun

    Flannery's claim that the flood levy was "the first climate change tax" clearly suggests the 2010 flood was caused by man-made warming.


    Yet the Climate Commission Flannery once headed has already admitted such a claim is false.


    As its The Critical Decade report said: "The floods across eastern Australia in 2010 and early 2011 were the consequence of a very strong La Nina event and not the result of climate change."
    So why is Flannery suggesting the opposite of what his own Climate Commission found?


    And why on earth do our academics believe him?
    And why do people keep believing in this, when the train is in freefall and the rocks are in sight?

    But what does a panel of experts, know?

    PS nice try, but l guess that the leash, didn't stretch far enough!
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  • Profile picture of the author whateverpedia
    Who brought Tim Flannery into the conversation?

    Fairly poor piece of whataboutism there, a total non sequitur.

    Why don't we compare his predictions with yours?
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  • Profile picture of the author tagiscom

    Probably too early for a goose, but it seems appropriate at this time.
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  • Profile picture of the author Yanglish
    Ah, and so it has arrived -- Thanksgiving. In my opinion the greatest holiday of them all.
    Happy Thanksgiving to all!!
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      Originally Posted by Yanglish View Post

      Ah, and so it has arrived -- Thanksgiving. In my opinion the greatest holiday of them all.
      Happy Thanksgiving to all!!
      I second that, but l live in AU, so we don't really get the Turkey lopping thing?

      And Thanksgiving to the Mods here, that do such a great job, in maintaining a strong code of standards, that make the WF the leading Forum online.

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  • Profile picture of the author Adelsten
    As it is Xmas day will probably be by candlelight?
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