I am absofrigginlutely friggin sick and friggin tired of free stuff!

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I hate that familiar email subject line - "Thank you Arthur - here's your free download"

Somebody somewhere has really got a bad case of the guru trots and are spraying effluent with gay abandon all over the internet.

Listen. If I have done nothing for you - DON'T thank me.
If you don't know me DON'T address me as Arthur
Most of all DON'T try to offload another friggin video or audio file of somebody I have never heard of taking too long to tell me how wonderful he/she is and how bad it used to was for them.

I am friggin sick of it. Every friggin wannabe marketer and his friggin clone is telling his buddy to send me his latest $97 product for frig all.

I get so much free stuff in my mail boxes that I could now have filled several hundred gigs with them all.

ENOUGH ALREADY!
Give them to somebody else!

Thank God for the mass delete key.
#absofrigginlutely #free #friggin #sick #stuff #tired
  • Profile picture of the author kemdev
    Exactly. How dare they email you after you've opted in to their list...

    Heathens.
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    • Profile picture of the author Killer Joe
      Originally Posted by Jesse Kemmerer View Post

      Exactly. How dare they email you after you've opted in to their list...

      Heathens.
      I get these all the time from senders who I have never heard of, nor have I opted-in to anything remotely similar to.

      There's a lot of email sharing/harvesting going on.

      I just hit the spam/phishing button.

      Life's too short to blow a blood vessel over these things...

      KJ
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    • Profile picture of the author artwebster
      Hey Jesse - Don't jump to usupported friggin conclusions.

      How dare you be so crass as to suggest I would think about complaining about messages from lists that I have opted in to?

      Anwswer by all means but don't make up your own friggin scenario!!!
      Signature

      You might not like what I say - but I believe it.
      Build it, make money, then build some more
      Some old school smarts would help - and here's to Rob Toth for his help. Bloody good stuff, even the freebies!

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  • Profile picture of the author BrandonIM
    Yeah, but I'd have to agree with him.
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  • Profile picture of the author BrandonIM
    Jesse - People like to buy, they don't like to be sold. I still think some creativity and originality could go a long way.
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  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    I agree with Art. It has nothing to do with being on someone's list.

    There are a number of people who are doing this now, I get an email from them and they say, "Here is your free download link" or "Here is your download link" except I didn't buy from them recently.

    Click the link and it is their affiliate link to the product, not the download link at all.

    It is only free if you buy another product from them and then they will give you this one as a bonus.

    It sucks, it's underhand, it's false advertising.

    Why do I stay on their list? Because I bought something from them, and if I unsubscribe I lose access to the product I paid good money for, so I delete all their emails now.

    Edit: I didn't mean about them using Art's name because he chose to put his name in their system

    Sounds like Art wasn't complaining about being on someone's list, but more about the way his name is used.
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  • Profile picture of the author LarryC
    lol. I like some of the free stuff that's available, but it can be too much. I actually feel a sense of dread now when I see "free ebook" or "free video." My desktop is already overloaded with largely redundant material.
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    • Profile picture of the author Jeremy Kelsall
      Art, have you even come across anything marketing related that you DO LIKE?

      Seriously man, why bother?

      From reading your posts - YOU LIKE NOTHING ABOUT MARKETING.

      You don't like the people

      You don't like the information

      You don't like the methods

      You don't like ANYTHING
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      • Profile picture of the author George Wright
        You have to admit though he sure is creating a brand. Brilliant.

        George Wright

        Originally Posted by Jeremy Kelsall View Post

        Art, have you even come across anything marketing related that you DO LIKE?

        Seriously man, why bother?

        From reading your posts - YOU LIKE NOTHING ABOUT MARKETING.

        You don't like the people

        You don't like the information

        You don't like the methods

        You don't like ANYTHING
        Signature
        "The first chapter sells the book; the last chapter sells the next book." Mickey Spillane
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      • Profile picture of the author artwebster
        Hi, Jeremy,

        Just because I don't go around kissing butts and saying how wonderful the good guys are doesn't disqualify me from making my feelings about the assinine idiots who can do no more than copy and paste clear - or does your subscription to the "this is an absolutely positively wonderful world in a benefiscent universe that I am so pleased to receive such generous largesse from" include a clause insisting upon knee jerk responses to anything that is positively negative?

        The good guys out there don't need to be told they are good but the anal sphincters might not know that they are what they are. After all, many of them seem to be learning from one or two people who seem to have reputations of knowing what they are doing and, therefor, being worth copying.
        Signature

        You might not like what I say - but I believe it.
        Build it, make money, then build some more
        Some old school smarts would help - and here's to Rob Toth for his help. Bloody good stuff, even the freebies!

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        • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
          Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

          Hi, Jeremy,

          Just because I don't go around kissing butts and saying how wonderful the good guys are doesn't disqualify me from making my feelings about the assinine idiots who can do no more than copy and paste clear - or does your subscription to the "this is an absolutely positively wonderful world in a benefiscent universe that I am so pleased to receive such generous largesse from" include a clause insisting upon knee jerk responses to anything that is positively negative?

          The good guys out there don't need to be told they are good but the anal sphincters might not know that they are what they are. After all, many of them seem to be learning from one or two people who seem to have reputations of knowing what they are doing and, therefor, being worth copying.

          Art, I think the problem is with your original post. You didn't make it clear
          that you weren't talking about lists that you opted into but rather people
          who were spamming you with garbage. We, in turn were lead to believe
          that...

          1. You opted into list
          2. Were sent offers.
          3. Got angry because of the offers sent.

          That would have anybody scratching their heads as the simple solution is,
          if you don't want to be sent offers, don't opt into lists. I don't. I can count
          the number of lists I am on, on one hand. The spam I get? Off the wall
          and drives me nuts. But there is only so much I can do about that. And
          yes, I agree that there are people out there who are clueless.

          Your post just wasn't very clear, which was why I originally didn't even
          know how to respond to it. Now I do, unless I am still not understanding
          your beef.
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        • Profile picture of the author Jeremy Kelsall
          Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

          Hi, Jeremy,

          Just because I don't go around kissing butts and saying how wonderful the good guys are doesn't disqualify me from making my feelings about the assinine idiots who can do no more than copy and paste clear - or does your subscription to the "this is an absolutely positively wonderful world in a benefiscent universe that I am so pleased to receive such generous largesse from" include a clause insisting upon knee jerk responses to anything that is positively negative?
          Art, I'm going to try to say this as respectfully as I can.

          YOU ARE A NEGATIVE PERSON.

          Look back through your own posts and point one out to me that was POSITIVE. You might have 1 or 2 hidden away somewhere, but 99.9% of your "thoughts and feelings" are negative.

          Everyone isn't out to "get you". Quite frankly, I could care less who you like and don't like - It doesn't put any money in or take any money out of my pocket.

          From some postings, it appears that you have enjoyed some success online/offline so, I guess what I don't get is, why the hell are you so Jaded?

          I have a feeling that if the emails addressed you by Mr. or Sir your next posting would be:

          "I'm sick and tired of people addressing me formally in emails"

          I honestly believe that there isn't much anyone could do to satisfy you or keep you happy.

          Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

          The good guys out there don't need to be told they are good but the anal sphincters might not know that they are what they are. After all, many of them seem to be learning from one or two people who seem to have reputations of knowing what they are doing and, therefor, being worth copying.
          The good guys? According to you, anyone that addresses you by your first name in an annoyance and dirt bag. So, what should we refer to you as on the forum?

          Lord?

          Master?

          How many people are using email marketing and not using their subscribers first name? I havn't run into any...

          So, by your own criteria, there are no good guys, except for yourself of course...

          Come down from your mountain and join us "regular" folks - the world is a refreshing place when you chill out.
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          • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
            Originally Posted by Jeremy Kelsall View Post

            Art, I'm going to try to say this as respectfully as I can.

            YOU ARE A NEGATIVE PERSON.

            Look back through your own posts and point one out to me that was POSITIVE. You might have 1 or 2 hidden away somewhere, but 99.9% of your "thoughts and feelings" are negative.

            Everyone isn't out to "get you". Quite frankly, I could care less who you like and don't like - It doesn't put any money in or take any money out of my pocket.

            From some postings, it appears that you have enjoyed some success online/offline so, I guess what I don't get is, why the hell are you so Jaded?

            I have a feeling that if the emails addressed you by Mr. or Sir your next posting would be:

            "I'm sick and tired of people addressing me formally in emails"

            I honestly believe that there isn't much anyone could do to satisfy you or keep you happy.



            The good guys? According to you, anyone that addresses you by your first name in an annoyance and dirt bag. So, what should we refer to you as on the forum?

            Lord?

            Master?

            How many people are using email marketing and not using their subscribers first name? I havn't run into any...

            So, by your own criteria, there are no good guys, except for yourself of course...

            Come down from your mountain and join us "regular" folks - the world is a refreshing place when you chill out.

            Thanks Jeremy...it had to be said.

            I just didn't want to be the one to say it.

            (Have gotten into enough trouble around here already)
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            • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
              How many people are using email marketing and not using their subscribers first name? I havn't run into any...
              [raises hand]
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              Stop by Paul's Pub - my little hangout on Facebook.

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              • Profile picture of the author MikeAmbrosio
                Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

                [raises hand]
                Hmmm - I guess he needs to get on your list then.

                He don't know what he's missing!

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              • Profile picture of the author Killer Joe
                Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

                [raises hand]
                Son of a gun...he's right

                Hey Artie, Pauly doesn't use first names...

                Dude, you need to get on his list...:p

                KJ
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              • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
                Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

                [raises hand]
                That's good enough for me.
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              • Profile picture of the author KimW
                Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

                [raises hand]
                I can vouch for that. I'm on Paul's list and never have any emails started with my first name.
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  • Profile picture of the author John Romaine
    Lets blow something up.
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  • Profile picture of the author ForeignProfessor
    Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

    I hate that familiar email subject line - "Thank you Arthur - here's your free download"

    ...
    Listen. If I have done nothing for you - DON'T thank me.
    If you don't know me DON'T address me as Arthur
    I hate being addressed by my given name by strangers too. I find it rude and invasive. I think that I'm somewhat of an exception though. I'm British, and about ten years ago I went to study in the US. Whilst I was there I had to open a bank account. A short time later I received a call from the bank which began along the lines of "Hi David, it's BANK here.."

    I found it incredibly rude. I know, in retrospect, they were trying to be friendly, and perhaps N. American customers expect to be addressed in this way, but I personally found it invasive and rude. In the UK my bank has been calling me Mr. since I was about 14 years old, and that's the way I like it.
    If you don't know me, don't use my given name. Please.

    I'm on the list of several internet marketers now who use my given name to address me in the emails they send out to hundreds or thousands of people. I find it uncomfortable and overly friendly. I understand their motive; they're trying to build a relationship with me. However, for me, this is the wrong way to go about it. As I said above though, I strongly suspect I'm an exception, and other people probably do feel 'special' when you include their name in a reply. I'm just not one of them.
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    • Profile picture of the author chrisgarrett
      Originally Posted by ForeignProfessor View Post

      I hate being addressed by my given name by strangers too
      Don't give them your name then

      I routinely sign up to opt in forms using xxx as my name, or even an insult term.

      Then when they email me it is all "Hi Dufusface, have I got a DEAL for YOU!?"
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      • Profile picture of the author CynCyn
        Originally Posted by chrisgarrett View Post

        Don't give them your name then

        I routinely sign up to opt in forms using xxx as my name, or even an insult term.

        Then when they email me it is all "Hi Dufusface, have I got a DEAL for YOU!?"
        That's hilarious! I do the same. I use a variation of "FukUrHot" and whenever they address me, I chuckle to myself, and it doesn't bother me what they're trying to sell. Infact, I love looking through my email headlines.

        "Here's your FRE.E Download, FukUrHot!" Why thank you...
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        • Profile picture of the author Tsnyder
          Originally Posted by CynCyn View Post

          That's hilarious! I do the same. I use a variation of "FukUrHot" and whenever they address me, I chuckle to myself, and it doesn't bother me what they're trying to sell. Infact, I love looking through my email headlines.

          "Here's your FRE.E Download, FukUrHot!" Why thank you...
          That is hilarious!

          Tsnyder
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          If you knew what I know you'd be doing what I do...
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          • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
            Art, um...well...oh gee...I don't (puzzled look :confused::confused

            Forget it...I got nuthin.
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            • Profile picture of the author TheRichJerksNet
              Originally Posted by Steven Wagenheim View Post

              Art, um...well...oh gee...I don't (puzzled look :confused::confused

              Forget it...I got nuthin.
              Yeah right! You'll be back .... :p

              James
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    • Profile picture of the author Pipinscott
      Originally Posted by ForeignProfessor View Post

      I hate being addressed by my given name by strangers too. I find it rude and invasive.

      In the UK my bank has been calling me Mr. since I was about 14 years old, and that's the way I like it.
      If you don't know me, don't use my given name. Please.
      So how did you sign up on the opt in page? With your given name?

      Autoresponders are stupid, you must tell them how you wish to be addressed.

      Yeup Americans can be overly familiar most of the time...Damn us Americans living our culture in our country
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    • Profile picture of the author artwebster
      Hi, Paul,

      Just because I complain does not reduce the value of my comments.

      Imagine the world in print if every service provider posted the same advert as evre other service provider.
      Signature

      You might not like what I say - but I believe it.
      Build it, make money, then build some more
      Some old school smarts would help - and here's to Rob Toth for his help. Bloody good stuff, even the freebies!

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    • Profile picture of the author artwebster
      I'm talking about people using your full name which you gave them when you said they could contact you. That needs to be made very clear here, you have filled in a form and entered your first name by request. You didn't have to do that, and you certainly have no ground to say "How the hell did you have the audacity to contact me and address me by my first name??".

      Good point Damien - except none of the people I am complaining about has my permission to email me about anything. They have obviously collected my name and email address from my sites or from other comments on other blogs and forums
      Signature

      You might not like what I say - but I believe it.
      Build it, make money, then build some more
      Some old school smarts would help - and here's to Rob Toth for his help. Bloody good stuff, even the freebies!

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      • Profile picture of the author MikeAmbrosio
        Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

        I'm talking about people using your full name which you gave them when you said they could contact you. That needs to be made very clear here, you have filled in a form and entered your first name by request. You didn't have to do that, and you certainly have no ground to say "How the hell did you have the audacity to contact me and address me by my first name??".

        Good point Damien - except none of the people I am complaining about has my permission to email me about anything. They have obviously collected my name and email address from my sites or from other comments on other blogs and forums
        Are you really getting that much email from lists you didn't opt in to?

        Interesting. I have been in this niche for about 7 years and while I occasionally get email from people who I didn't sign up for, I can count those on one hand.

        My guess is you opted in to probably one list who sold your info. But truthfully, I don't personally know any internet marketer who SELLS his list to other internet marketers. Not saying it doesn't happen - cause I am sure there's a couple out there who do. But by the way your OP and your follow ups sound you'd think it's happening to you daily. Or you're just real thin-skinned...

        Funny, I once signed up to a "big name" marketers list ON line, and soon after that started receiving junk mail OFF line. I knew who it was and went back to the page I signed up to and sure enough - the disclaimer stated that I could be getting related offers, etc. So I had no call to bitch. It was in his terms. I just didn't read it
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        • Profile picture of the author artwebster
          Hi, Steven,

          It was very silly of me to think that my blog post would be read and no implications drawn that were not in there.

          The assumption that I would complain about emails from people to whose lists I had suscribed is both short sighted and deeply offensive.

          No matter how many new email addresses I create they don't take long to be located and receive spam. Gmail seeems to have a particular vulnarability to being harvested.

          I also find it strange that few people seem to understand that by making my feelings known and receiving supporting comments from other people - I am actually showing how NOT to do things.

          I did receive one email from a stranger that I did not take offence at - the subject line was "You don't know me and I don't know you. My name is Peter . . ." It was the same rubbish email but time had been spent and effort expended to make it stand out.

          That, I did like.
          Signature

          You might not like what I say - but I believe it.
          Build it, make money, then build some more
          Some old school smarts would help - and here's to Rob Toth for his help. Bloody good stuff, even the freebies!

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        • Profile picture of the author artwebster
          Hi, Mike,

          I receive about 500 emails a day and about 80% are promotional types of emails from people I have never heard of.
          Signature

          You might not like what I say - but I believe it.
          Build it, make money, then build some more
          Some old school smarts would help - and here's to Rob Toth for his help. Bloody good stuff, even the freebies!

          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1315062].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author MikeAmbrosio
            Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

            Hi, Mike,

            I receive about 500 emails a day and about 80% are promotional types of emails from people I have never heard of.
            You get a lot more than I do. And I actually subscribe to many lists

            Gmail - the reason I switched to it a few years back is because it gets scraped WAY less than Hotmail or Yahoo. I did tests where I simply created new addresses on each. I did not post them or use them anywhere. Hotmail had spam in my box by the end of the second day. Yahoo within a week.

            But I still get next to none in the Gmail box. I set these up well over a year ago too.

            Maybe you just have bad luck
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  • Profile picture of the author Damien Roche
    You don't like being addressed by your first name by strangers? Wow, some people have a huge bargepole up their behinds.
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    • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
      Originally Posted by Damien Roche View Post

      You don't like being addressed by your first name by strangers? Wow, some people have a huge bargepole up their behinds.
      Damien, it wasn't that many years ago that parents taught their children to address all adults as Mr., Mrs., or Miss. Ms. had yet to be invented. Once reaching adulthood, one still addressed their elders/superiors by title unless given permission to use the person's first name.

      What gets me is when total strangers take things one step further and use a diminutive form of my first name. The group of people allowed to call me Johnny is very small and very exclusive. I hate answering the phone and going through this:

      Me: "Hello..."

      Captain Gladhand: "Hi! May I speak to John McCabe, please?" (last name mispronounced)

      Me: "You are speaking to him..."

      Captain Gladhand: "Hey, Johnny, how are you doing? I just wanted to let you know you've been selected for something really special. Johnny, you can buy..."

      [dial tone]
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      • Profile picture of the author Damien Roche
        Originally Posted by JohnMcCabe View Post

        Damien, it wasn't that many years ago that parents taught their children to address all adults as Mr., Mrs., or Miss. Ms. had yet to be invented. Once reaching adulthood, one still addressed their elders/superiors by title unless given permission to use the person's first name.

        What gets me is when total strangers take things one step further and use a diminutive form of my first name. The group of people allowed to call me Johnny is very small and very exclusive. I hate answering the phone and going through this:

        Me: "Hello..."

        Captain Gladhand: "Hi! May I speak to John McCabe, please?" (last name mispronounced)

        Me: "You are speaking to him..."

        Captain Gladhand: "Hey, Johnny, how are you doing? I just wanted to let you know you've been selected for something really special. Johnny, you can buy..."

        [dial tone]
        I see where you're coming from. You're right, using 'nicknames' or, as you say, a diminutive form of your first name, feels too icky. But I'm not talking about nicknames and I'm not talking about cold calling.

        I'm talking about people using your full name which you gave them when you said they could contact you. That needs to be made very clear here, you have filled in a form and entered your first name by request. You didn't have to do that, and you certainly have no ground to say "How the hell did you have the audacity to contact me and address me by my first name??".

        Don't like it, don't opt in or use Mr Poleass.

        It isn't an attack at anybody, just a general criticism on the attitude considering the context.
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        • Profile picture of the author Ken
          If first name use bothers you fill in the forms asking for your name with "Mr. Lastname"
          Problem solved.
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        • Profile picture of the author ForeignProfessor
          Originally Posted by Damien Roche View Post

          That needs to be made very clear here, you have filled in a form and entered your first name by request. You didn't have to do that, and you certainly have no ground to say "How the hell did you have the audacity to contact me and address me by my first name??".

          Don't like it, don't opt in or use Mr Poleass.
          Hey,

          Not every one is an internet marketer. Not everyone knows that if they fill in their name in the box they're going to get emails addressed to their given name for the foreseeable future. Everyone who spends time on this board or other internet marketing boards knows this may happen, but the 'general public' do not. If you're only targetting internet marketers who know EXACTLY what's going to be coming into their inbox, then fair enough.

          When I move house and get the gas company to change the billing to my name, or sign up for a new internet connection or any other day to day thing I inevitably give my full name. This doesn't mean I want them calling me by my given name, despite the fact I've given them the details.

          Again, I will stress, I am weird, and possibly Arthur(sorry!) is too. It's not an issue for most internet marketers since probably 90% or more of the population don't care. I happen to, Artwebster happens to, and we're probably freaks or old fashioned or something. That's all.
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          • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
            Originally Posted by Damien Roche View Post

            I see where you're coming from. You're right, using 'nicknames' or, as you say, a diminutive form of your first name, feels too icky. But I'm not talking about nicknames and I'm not talking about cold calling.

            I'm talking about people using your full name which you gave them when you said they could contact you. That needs to be made very clear here, you have filled in a form and entered your first name by request. You didn't have to do that, and you certainly have no ground to say "How the hell did you have the audacity to contact me and address me by my first name??".

            Don't like it, don't opt in or use Mr Poleass.

            It isn't an attack at anybody, just a general criticism on the attitude considering the context.
            I wasn't trying to argue with you, just point out that even though I filled in my name, it doesn't automatically establish permission to use (or abuse) it. It assumes a level of familiarity that does not exist in the majority of cases.

            I'm guessing that calling Art Webster "Arthur" has the same effect as someone calling me "Johnny".

            And you'd be surprised at how many list builders think my my first name is either Sir or My Lord... :p

            Originally Posted by ramone_johnny View Post

            Apparently George Clooney when staying in hotels, gives his lastname as "President". So that when any of the staff address him, they address him as "Good evening Mr. President"
            Governor Jesse "the Body" Ventura

            Governor Arnold "Terminator" Schwarzenegger

            President George Clooney? The first two are bad enough, the last one is the stuff of nightmares...
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          • Profile picture of the author HeySal
            Originally Posted by ForeignProfessor View Post

            Hey,

            Not every one is an internet marketer. Not everyone knows that if they fill in their name in the box they're going to get emails addressed to their given name for the foreseeable future. Everyone who spends time on this board or other internet marketing boards knows this may happen, but the 'general public' do not. If you're only targetting internet marketers who know EXACTLY what's going to be coming into their inbox, then fair enough.

            When I move house and get the gas company to change the billing to my name, or sign up for a new internet connection or any other day to day thing I inevitably give my full name. This doesn't mean I want them calling me by my given name, despite the fact I've given them the details.

            Again, I will stress, I am weird, and possibly Arthur(sorry!) is too. It's not an issue for most internet marketers since probably 90% or more of the population don't care. I happen to, Artwebster happens to, and we're probably freaks or old fashioned or something. That's all.
            Actually, it is not an attempt at being too familiar which causes the use of the first name - it is custom. Here in US we don't run via class system at all - yes there are classes, but it is extremely rude over here to notice the difference in class other than in a few settings, such as an elderly person being addressed as Mr. or Mrs. or in business settings. For conversational level social intercourse, first names are the norm, and it is a norm that is rapidly permeating the business world as well. You in countries used to more formal discourse will soon find that first names are becoming norm over there, too - and can look to the Internet and multi-cultural exposure for the cause/blame. Anyhow, that is why auto responders pick up first name instead of the prefix and last name. It would appear very stilted to most Americans to receive an email addressed to Mr. or Ms. instead of Hey, Jerry. It would cause us as much discomfort being addressed too formally in a given situation as it does for you to be addressed less formally than you are accustomed to.

            It's easy to imagine that this custom would drive people in societies which are more class differentiated a bit nuts - uncomfortable at the least. But do note - it is an auto-responder that is setting the salutation, not a person so they have no way of varying their salutations per culture. If you feel truly uncomfortable having your first name used converstationally -- instead of providing a first name to an autoresponder - put your chosen prefix -- understanding when you do, that the email might just read only
            "Dear Mr."

            It's getting to be a very small world - we have to start learning to be comfortable with such minute differences in cultural ways or we are all going to go friggen batty.
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            • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
              Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

              It would cause us as much discomfort being addressed too formally in a given situation as it does for you to be addressed less formally than you are accustomed to.
              Miss Sal, you have a point. It's quite possible to show complete scorn for another by exercising overly polite address. If you think of the stereotype French maitre' d, you'll understand just how insulting overly formal courtesy can be.

              I've seen much more of the formal address done out of respect since I moved South (capital S). It just seems to be a more Southern thing.
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            • Profile picture of the author seasoned
              Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

              Actually, it is not an attempt at being too familiar which causes the use of the first name - it is custom. Here in US we don't run via class system at all - yes there are classes, but it is extremely rude over here to notice the difference in class other than in a few settings, such as an elderly person being addressed as Mr. or Mrs. or in business settings. For conversational level social intercourse, first names are the norm, and it is a norm that is rapidly permeating the business world as well. You in countries used to more formal discourse will soon find that first names are becoming norm over there, too - and can look to the Internet and multi-cultural exposure for the cause/blame.
              Name has NOTHING to do with class, except in RARE circumstances in foreing countries, and even THAT is nearly GONE! And certain "titles" like mr, ms, mrs, etc... have NOTHING to do with class.

              First names ARE the norm for coworkers, friends, relatives, clients, but otherwise, FORGET IT! If a stranger comes up and calls me steve, I start to wonder if they are scamming, etc... I can certainly see arts point. And I DID sign up for lists that were later SOLD, and I get called by some SCAMMER trying to make me believe he is an old friend, etc.... When THEY fail, their EMPLOYEES do it. UNREAL!

              And other countries ARE getting less formal, but still, there is a modicum of respect to the way I spoke of here.

              Steve
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              • Profile picture of the author HeySal
                Originally Posted by seasoned View Post

                Name has NOTHING to do with class, except in RARE circumstances in foreing countries, and even THAT is nearly GONE! And certain "titles" like mr, ms, mrs, etc... have NOTHING to do with class.

                First names ARE the norm for coworkers, friends, relatives, clients, but otherwise, FORGET IT! If a stranger comes up and calls me steve, I start to wonder if they are scamming, etc... I can certainly see arts point. And I DID sign up for lists that were later SOLD, and I get called by some SCAMMER trying to make me believe he is an old friend, etc.... When THEY fail, their EMPLOYEES do it. UNREAL!

                And other countries ARE getting less formal, but still, there is a modicum of respect to the way I spoke of here. In America usage of titles is more a matter of familiar/unfamiliar or polite/familiar.

                Steve
                Being called by a title in most countries is a matter of socio-economic class - in America the class system isn't the same as most places, Steve -- I thought I pointed that out. Still, children are taught to address adults as Mr., Mrs. etc -- and that is socio-class.

                Class is nothing but a categorical division - and we have fewer than many cultures.
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    • Profile picture of the author KimW
      Originally Posted by Damien Roche View Post

      You don't like being addressed by your first name by strangers? Wow, some people have a huge bargepole up their behinds.
      Uh no dude,
      there are many of us that were raised where the use of the first name was a privilege and/or a right of passage.
      If I went from calling someone Mr so and so to calling him Bill, I did so whith the permission of Mr So and So.
      "You don't have to call me so and so, just call me Bill".
      It was a right that was earned , not given. It was and is a status leveler.
      When we are calling each other by our first names, we are dealing with each other on the same level.

      From your comment and your avatar I would guess that your a younger individual. I hate to generalize, because it isn't true of all young people, but from my own experience the younger generation doersn't understand the concept of manners.

      Now, I don't have a bargepole up my behind, but what I do have is a good upbringing and manners.
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      • Profile picture of the author MikeAmbrosio
        Originally Posted by KimW View Post

        Uh no dude,
        there are many of us that were raised where the use of the first name was a privilege and/or a right of passage.
        If I went from calling someone Mr so and so to calling him Bill, I did so whith the permission of Mr So and So.
        "You don't have to call me so and so, just call me Bill".
        It was a right that was earned , not given. It was and is a status leveler.
        When we are calling each other by our first names, we are dealing with each other on the same level.
        It's not totally dead yet. This is what I taught my kids (ages from 6 - 21) and they all practice this.

        From your comment and your avatar I would guess that your a younger individual. I hate to generalize, because it isn't true of all young people, but from my own experience the younger generation doersn't understand the concept of manners.
        Like it or not, this is how they are being brought up. This is no excuse, but there are a lot more 2-working parent households than when you or I were kids. My mother was stay at home until I was 12. This is a side effect due to not being taught this by the baby sitter/day care workers. (I am generalizing, obviously). Add to that the adults that really don't care about the Mr. or Mrs. - there seems to be a lot more of them today.

        Times have changed. We don't have to accept certain things in our own little worlds, but generally, there's not much you can do about the rest. Accept and move on.

        Anyway, the first name shtick is simply a marketing tactic that has been taught and practiced for years. I was getting catalogs and junk mail in my mail box with my first name on them for YEARS before I got on the internet.

        The reason it's so pronounced is because being marketers, we see it daily from everywhere.

        @Art - stress kills. Especially trivial stress like this Is it worth it over being offered free downloads by strangers? Opt out, report spam if you never opted in. Move on. Easy.
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  • Profile picture of the author TheRichJerksNet
    @Ken - Nice post ...lol

    @Art - This is why I do not subscribe to list at all... I do not want the junk, I do not care what the latest and greatest product is, I do not care who is launching what, I rather spend the time on my business.

    If I want to buy something, then I will go looking for it... Just think if all those wannabe gurus had me as a sub they would all be broke and homeless ...LOL!!

    James
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  • Profile picture of the author John Romaine
    Apparently George Clooney when staying in hotels, gives his lastname as "President". So that when any of the staff address him, they address him as "Good evening Mr. President"
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  • Profile picture of the author lakshaybehl
    And how is my autoresponder supposed to know if you are a Mr. or a Miss?

    Come on guys... there are people who try to be friendly, then there are people who ARE friendly. And there's a difference.

    -Lakshay
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    • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
      Talking of addressing strangers, I can't help recalling this clip...






      Seriously Art, I get the point; but such an OTT reaction to a problem that could easily be reduced by a straightforward opt-in list cull, suggests to me some diverted frustration from a more serious matter.

      Maybe you should try to tackle the real cause of your annoyance.

      Best,


      Frank
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  • Profile picture of the author BizzyUK
    The forced use of forenames in casual business transactions is disingenuous because it suggests a relationship, a degree of familiarity, that is in reality not there. It's NLP type BS, really, that doesn't fool anyone with an IQ over 50.

    Don't call me Bob. I know you don't care a rat's arse about me, so just stick to business and call me "sir" or better still "your lord-master", bringer of all that is true, right and noble. This approach works for me anyway.

    Now f*** off sirs and madams, I am busy.

    Mickey D.
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  • Profile picture of the author DAS_Matt
    This thread truly amuses me.
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  • Profile picture of the author KimW
    Mike, a lot of what you say is true and very valid.(Of course, I'm reading into your post a lot of agreement with me )

    Between my first wife and my second wife, I had physical custody of my three daughters for several years, and that is how they were brought up too.

    Your right, times have changed, and a lot of places teach their employees to call customers by our first name. And I admit,I am old fashioned, I don't hesitate to tell someone to call me Mr so and so, not by my first name.

    But again, that doesn't make myself or others like me have a bargeploe up our behind, it again means we were raised with manners.
    The fact that people aren't teaching and therefore others are not learning them is to me, indicative of the sad state of the world.
    Just my two cents.
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  • Profile picture of the author natscash
    You need to take a deep breath and relax. It's going to be OK...
    Just get a new e-mail address and give it to close friends and family only. Then you will not get as much mail. Keep the e-mail address you have now for opt in purposes.
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    • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
      Art,

      Yeah, well, get over it, dude. If someone calls me "Mr Myers," I correct them, politely. (My Dad is still alive and well. As long as that's true, he is Mr Myers.) I don't come whining to 100,000+ people about it. You deal with the cultural norms of the people who are talking to you, as long as they're reasonably respectful.

      If they called you "Artie," you'd have a legitimate beef. Otherwise, you're just bitching for the sake of bitching, and a lot of us are sick of it. If you don't like it, hang up, or delete the email.

      John,
      It's quite possible to show complete scorn for another by exercising overly polite address.
      Amen. If I switch from referring to someone as "Art" to "Mr Webster," and it's not clearly a joke (or someone I just like messing with), that's a warning to them that I'm in formal "Don't screw with me on this" mode. (Unless I've been specifically asked not to use the familiar form.)

      If I become excessively formal, that's rarely a good sign. The normal translation is, "I have the orbital nuclear death ray platform trained on your location, and you're about to join the choir invisibule. Go ahead. Make my day."

      Now, for people I don't know well, "sir" or "ma'am" is just common courtesy. But if I know you, and it's not clear I'm joking, that's a nasty warning.


      Paul
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  • Profile picture of the author CDarklock
    Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

    I hate that familiar email subject line - "Thank you Arthur - here's your free download"
    Agreed.

    When you thank me for my purchase, and I didn't make a purchase, your email does indeed get opened... so I can find out who is buying things with my account!

    And yes, I'm relieved to find you're just handing me a pitch. But that's rapidly replaced with "you *******." It's the email equivalent of yelling "fire!" to make people leave the room; you yelled "fraud!" to make me open your email. You suck and I hate you.
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    "The Golden Town is the Golden Town no longer. They have sold their pillars for brass and their temples for money, they have made coins out of their golden doors. It is become a dark town full of trouble, there is no ease in its streets, beauty has left it and the old songs are gone." - Lord Dunsany, The Messengers
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  • Profile picture of the author Gary Mitchell
    Some very emotional responses here. I have to agree to some degree, this free crap is getting out of hand-it's reminds me of graffiti -visual pollution.

    We could just hit the spam/phishing button like someone else said or as Ramone Johnny (my favorite comment)

    "Let's Blow Something Up!"

    perhaps not, but that sums it up.
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  • Profile picture of the author MichaelHiles
    Hey Art, I'd like to invite you to my FREE online class I'm presenting.

    It's regularly $15,151,234.26 but I will let you sit in for free. Just click on the link in my sig and opt-in.



    Oh, I never use people's first name on my opt-in list either.

    I usually just write "Hey everybody" because everybody knows that I am addressing "everybody" because it's a freakin' opt-in list.
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  • Profile picture of the author Online Bliss
    Thanks Jeremy,
    I almost thought I was on the wrong forum.
    The number 1 reason why I come here is to learn.
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  • Profile picture of the author artwebster
    Jeremy and Steven

    Even the American corruption of the English language has yet to make it possible for anybody to make a negative statement.

    I despair of all the rubbish I read about being 'positive' all the time.

    It is the fact that I am so positive that enables me to write what I write. I have opinions. Those opinions are not some wishy washy précis of some punked up book designed to make the re-writer wealthy.

    I have not survived a life time of cancer by being negative. I do not struggle with my rapidly fading sight by being negative.

    I am probably the most positive person you will ever encounter when it comes to attitude. When it comes to the written word I am no more positive or negative than the next person.

    The English language does not permit negative statements.

    Like so many other xxxxxisms that have been created by this crazy world of 'political correctness' (the ultimate oxymoron), negativism exists only in the mind of the reader. Look to yourselves and wonder why my positive dislikes and positive statements have your knickers in such a twist.

    Could it be that, deep down, as marketers, you agree with what I say but feel constrained by the need to abide by the rules of that latest of all religious manifestations, crapology?
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    Some old school smarts would help - and here's to Rob Toth for his help. Bloody good stuff, even the freebies!

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    • Profile picture of the author JayXtreme
      Originally Posted by artwebster View Post


      Could it be that, deep down, as marketers, you agree with what I say but feel constrained by the need to abide by the rules of that latest of all religious manifestations, crapology?
      lol... I had to laugh at this...

      :rolleyes:

      Peace

      Jay
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    • Profile picture of the author MikeAmbrosio
      Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

      Could it be that, deep down, as marketers, you agree with what I say but feel constrained by the need to abide by the rules of that latest of all religious manifestations, crapology?
      Not even for a second.

      Could it be that deep down inside that you agree you come across on this forum as very negative even though you side-step it with sentences like "The English language does not permit negative statements."?

      Like it or not, most people will read this as a negative statment:

      I am absofrigginlutely friggin sick and friggin tired of free stuff!


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      • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
        You know, there are things I don't like either but I don't come here and
        bitch about them, and things a lot more serious than just getting some emails
        you don't like.

        I'm talking about digital theft, hacking, libel, payment processors that can
        shut you down at the blink of an eye for literally no reason at all other than
        they think you're a bad risk, and on and on.

        But I deal with it. I do what I can to protect myself and I don't spend tons
        of negative energy complaining about it, which is what you seem to do
        constantly.

        Here is the way I look at it Art, and you can take this from somebody who
        used to bitch about everything.

        You can keep on complaining or you can sit down and think about what
        you can do to rectify the problem.

        If it can't be rectified, in other words it's something that's literally beyond
        your control, then learn to live with it.

        You'll live a lot longer if you do.

        I can't even begin to tell you how calm and relaxed I finally am these days.
        I let NOTHING get to me anymore. If I have a problem, I deal with it. If I
        can't fix it, I find a way to make the best out of it.

        I have found very few problems that can't be fixed. But the ones that
        can't, I just find a way to cope.

        Like I said, you'll live a lot longer if you can adopt this philosophy in your
        life.

        Wishing you nothing but the best.
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    • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
      Banned
      C'mon Art old chap, life's too short to be annoyed by simple things like e-mail messages. Use that passion to do something constructive.
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Even the American corruption of the English language has yet to make it possible for anybody to make a negative statement.
    You know what I am absofrigginlutely sick of? It's people that keep bashing American English as being a *******ization of a language while it is merely a natural evolution of a demographic split from the mother-tongue users. Take a look at your own language - what would people 300 years ago think of your speech? I can tell you that people in the UK aren't speaking their native tongue either - check out old and middle English and you might have to actually take a course to be able to read it. Languages are not *******ized......they are not static, they are instinctual and the evolution shows the change in the cultures which use them if you care to study it. If you don't you might as well just start harping on the change in culture in general...because one doesn't change without the other - it's not a separate entity.

    And what the hell is the crap that we can make no negative statements in English?
    How bout this one for a damned good example:
    That's the biggest bunch of ****ing Bull Sh** I have ever heard.

    I would suggest you enroll in some linguistic classes and learn exactly what language is before weilding pompous attutudes which are totally ungrounded by reality at a people who speak that language. I'm getting tired of Anti-American attitudes being proliferated by a finger pointed at the evolution of a language. Pick a different point for bigotry. That one doesn't hold water.
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    • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
      except in RARE circumstances in foreign countries
      Ummm... Steve? To 95% of the world, America is a foreign country.


      Paul
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      • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
        Sal,

        Art knows exactly what he's saying when he claims it's impossible to make a negative statement in English. It's actually not possible in any spoken language, using the meaning he's using for the word 'negative.'

        Unless someone has developed conversational mathematics, that is.

        He's distorting the contextual meaning to enable himself to say what he thinks sounds good, which isn't the most useful approach to communication. Nasty semantic process, at best. Disingenuous at worst.


        Paul
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        • Profile picture of the author HeySal
          Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

          Sal,

          Art knows exactly what he's saying when he claims it's impossible to make a negative statement in English. It's actually not possible in any spoken language, using the meaning he's using for the word 'negative.'

          Unless someone has developed conversational mathematics, that is.

          He's distorting the contextual meaning to enable himself to say what he thinks sounds good, which isn't the most useful approach to communication. Nasty semantic process, at best. Disingenuous at worst.


          Paul
          Paul - faulty logical analogy doesn't make a statement correct. Language is an instinctual form of communications. If the semantic import of a statement is negative, the statement is negatively charged. In English, as well as other languages there are even absolute negations which will negatively charge any statement they are used within. Equation of language and mathematics is a logical falacy not much unlike the falacy of equivocation in which one word is taken to have two meanings and the outstanding, or secondary meaning is used to anchor the premise.

          Being sinuous and verbose does not make one right.

          John - all languages have dialects. That's why a standard for each nation is usually taught in schools. These standards are more descriptive than prescriptive, but they do solve the problem of languages evolving so rapidly that it loses all structure - which it often did before the printing press helped to stabilize things.

          I have a tech who lives in the Southern states and often have trouble understanding him on the phone. It doesn't mean he isn't speaking English.
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          • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
            Sal,
            faulty logical analogy doesn't make a statement correct.
            Art's not using an analogy there. He's using a specialized meaning of the word "negative," which is normally not used in casual conversation.
            Equation of language and mathematics is a logical falacy
            Huh? Where's the fallacy? Math IS a language.

            Anyway, the math reference was mine, and intended more as a joke than to be taken seriously. The usage Art chose isn't precisely mathematical. It has a meaning very close to, "Having total meaning of less than nothing."

            Note: Not "useful value" or "effective impact." Actual semantic content. Sort of like having a negative absolute temperature. It's not possible in any spoken language with which I'm familiar, and probably not possible for any language usable by human beings.

            Clearly not the usage anyone else in the conversation would be likely to intend. That he knew this is clear from his later use of the word "positive" in reference to attitude.

            This isn't really a fallacy of equivocation, because each side's comments are internally consistent in their usage of a chosen definition for the term. This is more like a word game on his part. And not one of the polite ones.


            Paul
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      • Profile picture of the author Killer Joe
        Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

        Ummm... Steve? To 95% of the world, America is a foreign country.

        Paul
        Hmmm, reminds me of when I lived in Osaka...the imported beers were Budwiser and Coors among others.

        Einstein was onto something with that relativity theory of his. :rolleyes:

        KJ
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        • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
          Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

          You know what I am absofrigginlutely sick of? It's people that keep bashing American English as being a *******ization of a language while it is merely a natural evolution of a demographic split from the mother-tongue users. Take a look at your own language - what would people 300 years ago think of your speech? I can tell you that people in the UK aren't speaking their native tongue either - check out old and middle English and you might have to actually take a course to be able to read it. Languages are not *******ized......they are not static, they are instinctual and the evolution shows the change in the cultures which use them if you care to study it. If you don't you might as well just start harping on the change in culture in general...because one doesn't change without the other - it's not a separate entity.
          I've been watching more reality TV from the UK lately, and in some areas I defy someone from elsewhere to identify the language spoken as English. It seems like the accents and idiom change from county to county. Then you do the same with Ireland, Scotland and Wales. In a geographic area smaller than Texas, you'll easily find English speakers who can't even understand each other.

          I imagine you could find the same effect if you took a native Texan, someone from Brooklyn, and an inner-city 'gangsta', and asked them to have a conversation.

          Which only supports your point...

          Sidenote: Anyone who doesn't believe that two positives can ever make a negative has never offered an idea and had the other person roll their eyes and answer, "yeah, right."
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  • Profile picture of the author iliveonarainbow
    Ugh, I get so much junky stuff in my email all the time, It's really annoying when I'm just wanting to find something important in my email.
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    No, Math is not language. While it possesses language, it is a quite different entity.
    Did you know mathemeticians brains are wired in such a way that normal innate constructs of conversation are often unrecognizable in their speech.

    I do know what he meant - but as you pointed out, it was a diversionary tactic and diversionary tactics don't usually stand up to logical argumentation constructs.



    Actually my degree is in ethno-linguistics and the absolute negation is quite standard in MOST languages if not all. Negation in linguistics is not the same animal as negation in mathematics, no matter how far someone wants to stretch the word "negation". However after having to listened to enough of this, I'm starting to wonder if maybe a mathematical negation might not just apply to this thread.
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    • Profile picture of the author Killer Joe
      Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

      No, Math is not language.
      Sal,

      I, 4 1, think that 2.

      KJ
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      • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
        Sal,
        No, Math is not language. While it possesses language, it is a quite different entity.
        'Mathematics' can be used to describe both the discipline and the language. I should think my meaning would have been clear when I mentioned the idea of "conversational mathematics."

        From M-W.com:

        (2) : a systematic means of communicating ideas or feelings by the use of conventionalized signs, sounds, gestures, or marks having understood meaning

        (5) : a formal system of signs and symbols (as FORTRAN or a calculus in logic) including rules for the formation and transformation of admissible expression
        Actually my degree is in ethno-linguistics and the absolute negation is quite standard in MOST languages if not all.
        You've moved to yet a third specialized definition, one which is familiar to linguists of any stripe, but which has little connection to the other uses that have been discussed so far. It certainly has nothing intrinsically to do with the idea of positive or negative tendencies in attitudes.

        'Negation' describes an act, and as such conveys meaning. A statement of negation is, therefore, not negative in the sense of having less than zero meaningful content.

        If you wish to prove that my contention is incorrect, you can do so with one simple act: Give me any example of a statement which has less than zero meaningful content.


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        • Profile picture of the author Josh Bartlett
          Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

          Give me any example of a statement which has less than zero meaningful content.Paul
          "Politicians tell the truth"

          "You can get rich without putting any work in with x system"

          How about these? They have less than zero meaningful content
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          • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
            Josh,
            "Politicians tell the truth"

            "You can get rich without putting any work in with x system"

            How about these? They have less than zero meaningful content
            They have content that many/most would consider inaccurate, but the content exists and has meaning.

            So there!


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        • Profile picture of the author CDarklock
          Originally Posted by Paul Myers View Post

          'Negation' describes an act, and as such conveys meaning. A statement of negation is, therefore, not negative in the sense of having less than zero meaningful content.
          If there exists a socially accepted definition of a word that would be contextually correct, it is disingenuous to assert that its use is incorrect simply because you would prefer that it have a different definition.

          It is likewise disingenuous to claim that only specific definitions out of a specific dictionary are acceptable. You may think "PPC" means "Pay Per Click," but you won't find that definition in Webster's dictionary, and you're also not going to get much of anywhere telling me that my Battletech 70-ton Warhammer is obviously equipped with dual AdSense blocks - "PPC," in that context, means "Particle Projection Cannon." You're not finding that in Webster's, either. You might not understand it, but that doesn't make it wrong.
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          • Profile picture of the author Paul Myers
            CD,
            If there exists a socially accepted definition of a word that would be contextually correct, it is disingenuous to assert that its use is incorrect simply because you would prefer that it have a different definition.
            The only objection I have to specific usage in this thread is Art's switch from the original to an alternative usage in order to say something that was technically correct, but made no sense in the original context.

            I did point out that his statement, while seemingly game-playing, was accurate for one specialized usage of the word. Sal then disagreed with me, based on a different usage, more likely from an understanding learned in her training than from any active motive.
            It is likewise disingenuous to claim that only specific definitions out of a specific dictionary are acceptable.
            I made no such claim. I merely pointed to 2 alternate entries for the word 'language,' to show that mathematics does, in fact, hold that status by some accepted definitions. There was no exclusion of any kind in that reference.

            In fact, I agreed with the validity of every definition of the word "negative" that was used in this thread, and just pointed out that the changes in usage made for challenges based on the changing context.

            Continuing to assert that "it's impossible for a statement to have less than zero meaning" is a separate thing from the matter of 'correctness.'


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            • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
              Okay, many people here are getting into technical semantics of whether or
              not there is such a thing as a negative statement.

              To me, IMO, this is all a bunch of hogwash.

              To the common uneducated layman (at least as far as this malarkey goes)
              a negative statement is the following:

              McDonald's hamburgers stink
              All politicians are crooks
              All Internet marketers are liars
              I hate getting tons of email
              I hate when it rains

              I could keep going, but I think you get the point. And without using the
              words positive or negative in my layman's definition, here is how I simply
              define a negative statement.

              "A statement that shows dislike for something or someone."

              I think that's how the typical unsophisticated, plain old Joe in the street
              defines a negative statement.

              In other words, I know it when I hear it.

              So you can take all the philosophizing and technicalities and other mumbo
              jumbo and toss it in the trash as far as I'm concerned.

              If somebody walks up to me and says...

              "I think your haircut is ugly as sin"

              That is NOT a positive statement.

              If, however, they came up to me and said something like...

              "You know, I know a way that you can really get your hair to look fantastic"

              THAT is a positive statement.

              Their meaning may essentially be the same (my haircut sucks) but they've
              said it in such a way that it comes out positive and doesn't make me feel
              as crappy.

              Again, you can use all the definitions you want. But I'm just a plain Joe. I
              know a negative statement when I hear it.

              And Art's OP was full of 'em.
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  • Profile picture of the author Josh Bartlett
    This is quite possibly the most interesting thread I have read in a while lol

    Its funny also how a negative mood can rub off isnt it? Lets all just have a fight, brush ourselves off and start again

    Only joking, I love everyone.

    I guess you can never please anyone all of the time can you.

    For example, I dont stick to first name or calling people Mr/Mrs either.

    I usually gage the person individually and adapt to suit the social situation.. (Do most people do this, I think they probably do?)

    Also, surely the point here is that he doesnt like unsolicited spam? Saying he doesnt like unsolicited spam which also uses his first name is fair enough but its a bit like saying you dont like being hit over the head with a brick isnt it? (Who does?) Makes you wonder if he changed the main point he was making half way through?

    Anyway, id have to say, based on the original posters own statement, I dont know why he got defensive or angry at anything anyone said in this thread... (not possible apparently)

    Its not possible they could of been saying anything negative so I wonder what it was about what they said that made him look at it in a neg....

    Oh forget it
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  • Profile picture of the author artwebster
    Absolutely fascinating.

    The ideas that this thread has thrown up are quite striking and it is amusing to see the way the human mind can work to try to support a stance.

    I am sick and tired of people who don't know me, who don't have permision to email me, to whose lists I have not subscribed sending me emails implying that I have.

    My amusement at the argument about negative statements was so great that I went blind for about two hours and had to come back to it.

    It's a bit like a situation where someone walking into an ever deeper layer of quicksand could convince himeself by his 'positive' attitude that the quicksand will become less deep and. as he finally sucumbed to the lack of air as his nostrils went under the surface saying "Well, that's a little more space in the world now that I am no longer in it."

    Still, if marketers find that it makes them uncomfortable to have someone around them who is able to see the world as it is and not as they would like it to be they are worthy of my sympathy and deserve all that might transpire as the become tainted with the same reputation so many wannabe marketers are so busily creating for them.

    Closing your eyes only stops you seeing - it does not make anything go away.
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    • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
      Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

      Absolutely fascinating.

      The ideas that this thread has thrown up are quite striking and it is amusing to see the way the human mind can work to try to support a stance.

      I am sick and tired of people who don't know me, who don't have permision to email me, to whose lists I have not subscribed sending me emails implying that I have.

      My amusement at the argument about negative statements was so great that I went blind for about two hours and had to come back to it.

      It's a bit like a situation where someone walking into an ever deeper layer of quicksand could convince himeself by his 'positive' attitude that the quicksand will become less deep and. as he finally sucumbed to the lack of air as his nostrils went under the surface saying "Well, that's a little more space in the world now that I am no longer in it."

      Still, if marketers find that it makes them uncomfortable to have someone around them who is able to see the world as it is and not as they would like it to be they are worthy of my sympathy and deserve all that might transpire as the become tainted with the same reputation so many wannabe marketers are so busily creating for them.

      Closing your eyes only stops you seeing - it does not make anything go away.

      Art, you're missing the whole point and sadly there is nothing I can do
      about that.

      I am not burying my head in the sand and closing my eyes. I know there
      is a ton of crap in the world. I am bombarded with it everyday. I just
      choose not to dwell on it. I don't make every thread I start about how
      I hate this or hate that, which is what you seem to do more often than
      not.

      If you think I am wrong, go back and read the majority of the threads
      you've started. I don't remember the last time you had anything nice to
      say.

      I for one don't want to live like that.

      If you do, so be it.

      I'm obviously never going to change your disposition.
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    • Profile picture of the author MikeAmbrosio
      Originally Posted by artwebster View Post


      Still, if marketers find that it makes them uncomfortable to have someone around them who is able to see the world as it is and not as they would like it to be they are worthy of my sympathy and deserve all that might transpire as the become tainted with the same reputation so many wannabe marketers are so busily creating for them.
      Art,

      Sorry, but you don't see the world as it is...

      You see it as YOU see it.

      I know this is true because I don't agree with all of your sentiments.

      To repeat your statement (sort of), you don't know me, therefore you have no clue how I see the world.

      Paul, Sal...

      Put the darn schoolbooks away! Schools out!
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  • Profile picture of the author artwebster
    To the common uneducated layman (at least as far as this malarkey goes)
    a negative statement is the following:

    McDonald's hamburgers stink
    All politicians are crooks
    All Internet marketers are liars
    I hate getting tons of email
    I hate when it rains


    How very patronising!
    Each of these statements makes a positive point - even if inaccurate in a couple of cases.

    I believe that the 'common uneducated layman' is not nearly as stupid as you imply. Does the fact that I love when it rains (all eight or ten days of it) make my love of rain any more positive than the hate that someone else who is exposed to more rain feel? I don't think so.

    What is it that makes you so fearful about facing reality? Is it really so psychologically damaging to you if you should over hear some one saying something that you perceive as negative?

    There again, we all know the one about the eye of the beholder - maybe it works for the ear as well.
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  • Profile picture of the author artwebster
    If you think I am wrong, go back and read the majority of the threads
    you've started. I don't remember the last time you had anything nice to
    say


    Is having something nice to say more important than making a point to highlight a mistake that many new marketers are making?

    If the whole world went around feeling that nothing was wrong, nothing would ever be put right:
    Signature

    You might not like what I say - but I believe it.
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    • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
      Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

      If you think I am wrong, go back and read the majority of the threads
      you've started. I don't remember the last time you had anything nice to
      say


      Is having something nice to say more important than making a point to highlight a mistake that many new marketers are making?

      If the whole world went around feeling that nothing was wrong, nothing would ever be put right:

      Art, I'm going to make this short and to the point.

      I am done arguing with you.

      And you can take that as positive, negative or any old way you like.
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  • Profile picture of the author artwebster
    HeySal
    That's the biggest bunch of ****ing Bull Sh** I have ever heard - is about as positive as it comes.

    Steven
    Arguing? Who's arguing? I'm simply stating my point of view. As with all points of view, it is almost impossible to have people with identical ones. If you find stating and discussing alternative views is an argument I feel sorry for you.

    If nobody points out the faults because everybody is so 'positive', how does anything ever get fixed?

    As I say, you might not like what I say, but I believe it. My belief will not be changed by recrimination and resignation. A proper, qualified argument might - but they seem to be in short supply. Maybe you and the rest are not quite positive enough to overcome my level of positive charge?
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    Build it, make money, then build some more
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    • Profile picture of the author CDarklock
      Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

      If nobody points out the faults because everybody is so 'positive', how does anything ever get fixed?
      If everybody goes around complaining about what's broken, who's going to fix it?
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      • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
        Originally Posted by CDarklock View Post

        If everybody goes around complaining about what's broken, who's going to fix it?
        Excellent point CD.

        I prefer fixing rather than complaining.
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        • Profile picture of the author CDarklock
          Originally Posted by Steven Wagenheim View Post

          I prefer fixing rather than complaining.
          Sometimes I complain to see whether something is worth fixing.

          If you complain about something and people look at you funny, it's probably not worth your time.

          But if you complain and a bunch of people go "yeah, WTF is up with that?!" - well, you can probably sell them a solution.
          Signature
          "The Golden Town is the Golden Town no longer. They have sold their pillars for brass and their temples for money, they have made coins out of their golden doors. It is become a dark town full of trouble, there is no ease in its streets, beauty has left it and the old songs are gone." - Lord Dunsany, The Messengers
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          • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
            Originally Posted by CDarklock View Post

            Sometimes I complain to see whether something is worth fixing.

            If you complain about something and people look at you funny, it's probably not worth your time.

            But if you complain and a bunch of people go "yeah, WTF is up with that?!" - well, you can probably sell them a solution.
            Excellent point and very clever.

            I guess I should try complaining once in a while.

            But what to complain about? :confused:
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            • Profile picture of the author JayXtreme
              Originally Posted by Steven Wagenheim View Post


              But what to complain about? :confused:
              I'm sure Art can help you out on this one, Steve

              He could find something wrong with the beautiful summer sunrise if he felt like it...

              Peace

              Jay
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              Bare Murkage.........

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              • Profile picture of the author artwebster
                Hi, Jay,

                He could find something wrong with the beautiful summer sunrise if he felt like it...

                You are damned right I could! My facility with the English language and mental agility allow me to argue any point from either side.

                It is foolish, though, to think that because I could, I would.

                I still get those friggin' emails but I have noticed a distinct drop in the numbers - should I conclude that the ones that have stopped coming were from warriors? Looking at some of the ways conclusions have been drawn in this stream I guess I would be justified.
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                • Profile picture of the author JayXtreme
                  Originally Posted by artwebster View Post

                  Hi, Jay,
                  Hello!

                  You are damned right I could!
                  I know I'm right... that's why I said it...

                  My facility with the English language and mental agility allow me to argue any point from either side.
                  I think, you really mean:

                  "My ability to butcher the English language and mental fragility allow me to argue any point from either side"



                  It is foolish, though, to think that because I could, I would.
                  Foolish?... or incredibly perceptive of me to think you would?

                  I still get those friggin' emails
                  I would think so too... you have to un-subscribe to stop receiving them.

                  Have a great day, Art. You are a credit to this forum.. well.. at least the OT forum is good for a laugh

                  Peace

                  Jay
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  • Profile picture of the author Bev Clement
    So you are positive about everything, postive there is nothing wrong with the positive way you post and positive that the rest of us don't have a clue about anything because we can see the difference between positive and negative.

    I'm positive that you are the most negative person around.

    So being sick and tired of everything and everybody is the way to be positive.

    I wonder if you walk around saying I don't have cancer or am going blind, because I am positive it isn't going to happen.
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  • Profile picture of the author JayXtreme
    Art,

    You make me laugh...

    Thank you.

    If I was living close to you, I'd be worried about safety... but you're far enough away for me to enjoy it...

    Peace

    Jay
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  • Profile picture of the author artwebster
    I prefer fixing rather than complaining.
    That is interesting. How do you know it needs fixing? If it is negative to say that something is not right, how much more negative is it to say that something needs your intervention to be put right?

    You see it as YOU see it.
    This is really stating the bleedin' obvious. How else would I see it?

    But if you complain and a bunch of people go "yeah, WTF is up with that?!" - well, you can probably sell them a solution.
    You can only do that if they are not so anal as to insist that a comment is 'negative' no matter what the intent.

    I wonder if you walk around saying I don't have cancer or am going blind, because I am positive it isn't going to happen.
    This comment sums up the rabid and insane (if incoherent) desire to justify an attitude regardless of the degree of contempt that the words convey.

    No, Bev, I do not go around saying I don't have cancer - what I do is control by will power the pain that I suffer 24/7/365 so that I do not have to resort to opiates (like an alcoholic, opiate adicts can find that the full rage of adiction can be started again by a single slip). I do not kid myself that some belief in the positive fairy is going to prevent the loss of my sight. I am hopeful that it will not happen but, I suppose, in the parlance of internet marketers, that is being negative.

    Thank you, any way, for giving me the one response that, above all others, illustrates the crass nature of the internet marketing mind. Very enlightening.
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  • Profile picture of the author Slin
    Huh, well you keep complaining about something you pretty much have no control over (OK I will admit sometimes It feels good to get rants out)

    I am going to go back to making money.
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  • Profile picture of the author Shellfish
    Hi Art, if you are getting that insane volume of worthless email you might want to use Popfile. It's free.

    POPFile - Automatic Email Classification - Trac

    Install it and you will never see that stuff. The first 100 or 200 emails you might need to train it a little but after that you are home free. I'm running 99.87 accuracy over the last 5 years and I never even see those type emails you speak of.

    It's good for your nervous system too!
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  • Profile picture of the author artwebster
    Thanks Jay,

    A voice of reason, a reflection of perception and a contrary view - just what a discussion needs.

    I would opt out of the emails but they are the ones that don't have an opt out option.

    I will try the solution from Shellfish.
    Signature

    You might not like what I say - but I believe it.
    Build it, make money, then build some more
    Some old school smarts would help - and here's to Rob Toth for his help. Bloody good stuff, even the freebies!

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